great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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