having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Couch. On fire.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
