Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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