She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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