We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
