I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
