OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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