is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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