Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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