I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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