Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
im holly from the hills drunk
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
