life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
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