Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
