he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Screwed.edu
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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