I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
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