My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Everyone says I win the strip club
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Randomize
