Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
