dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
