Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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