Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
