your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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