Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
