Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
