1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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