yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
BRING THE BAGELS
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
