And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
