My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
