This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
