This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
