Ambien. No doubt about it.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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