Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
