I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
3 2 1 whiskey
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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