so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
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