She's JV to your varsity
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
