see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
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