New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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