I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
