He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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