Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize
