nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
