this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
