dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
