I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
