Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Randomize
