So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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