her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
