Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize