We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
