That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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