I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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