You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Who put my cat in the fridge?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
