I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
